Not enough hours in the day is the story of working women’s lives all over the world. Men, even naughtie’s men generally have it easier, though granted more things pres on their time than our father’s and grandfather’s experienced.  But this morning was the worst culmination of what professional women and mother’s dread…. missing that vital event in their child’s life, doubly awful when the child asks you to be there and your promise you will be, and why was it missed? not because of a crash on the bypass or a tractor in the road, not even a spilt lorry load… no it was because of work.

Whilst I know times are hard and so we can’t expect things to fall in our lap and make life easy and with all the stresses that go with that there is the need to protect and consider the wellfair of staff it seams to me that there are some that realise the team includes everyone and some that think the team is everyone else.

A large company function for clients needs to be cleared up after, but it is like being at school, you can always tell the different children apart there are the one’s that stay to put the chairs away after assembly and then there are the one’s that don’t. Now the latter have not done wrong or misbehaved or failed to do as they are told, just have not thought about the feelings of the one’s that will be volunteering their services without question.

Well enough said, I cant work miracles and if we succeed then I am sure it will be due to everyone’s contribution, and if we fail it will be my fault.

But in the end it is because I thought I could get to the office, check the bank account, which is pushing against the over draft limit, and be back to listen to my daughter’s first ever performance singing solo infront of her school. I timed it perfectly and was heading down the stairs towards the car with 15 minutes to spare to get back to school. I had even checked with the head “not before 10 to 10 she said”… I was safe. As I reached for the car door handle my mobile phone range “Mrs Duffield, just to let you know Becca will be performing early, she is starting now”. Ohh for a startrek transporter just about now!

Impossible, even at break neck speeds I couldn’t do it, and as I arrived the school was filing out of assembly and I was left to see the tear filled eyes of my 9 year old daughter as I arrived.

I failed and no matter what her teacher said about the fact Becca knew they had to start early, or that they were sorry I was led to believe I would have time to dissapear and come back, or that she was able to sing for me afterwards…. it was not the same. I had failed my daughter and no one can change that fact and why? because I am short staffed at work and I could not take the morning off just to be safe that I would not miss this momentous and unrepeatable moment.

Until people realise they have to go the extra mile to pull as part of the team I will continue to live with the possibiilty on disasters like today. Why to I maintain working mother’s have it harder? yes it is partly their own fault and partly the society that has changed so dramatically over the last 40 years, but still we are conditioned to be riddled with guilt when we cant do everything, and men simply do not suffer with that ailment in any way what so ever….. very black and white “you cant change it, it happened dont worry it is not worth getting fretted about” will they never understand?